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Apparently we could get a whopping 3 Chris Lams to attend
— Matvey Soloviev,
scheduling a 4820 staff picnic
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May 17, 2021
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Functional languages have this cool feature where they waste half your memory.
— Andrew Myers,
on garbage collection
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May 12, 2021
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There's not much forgiveness in an operating system. You do something you're not supposed to do, and you basically just get killed.
— Anne Bracy,
discussing privileged processes in CS 3410.
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May 4, 2021
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I wish I could talk to my trees
— Robert Constable
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Sept. 2, 2020
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What if Mars has better chocoloate?
— Sachille Atapattu,
Considering death by chocolate
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April 14, 2019
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Tom: This is somebody's PhD, and maybe not you guys.
Rolph: I already have like three PhDs, I don't want more.
— Rolph Recto,
Discussing feature creep in projects.
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March 7, 2019
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Tom: Josh is having trouble. It's the lack of monads.
Josh: Actually.
— Tom Magrino,
explaining why Josh kept taking longer than everyone else to program his RoboRally robot
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March 2, 2019
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Stack Overflow often has the answer for how to look up the answer, though.
— Drew Zagieboylo,
explaining how to figure out how to profile Java
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Nov. 19, 2018
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If you want to know when he's up, just keep texting him, "U up?"
— Isaac Sheff,
on how to keep tabs on one's friends
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Nov. 16, 2018
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Shir: Does anyone know what the sound from the clock tower is? It sounds like a pterodactyl. Or a Whale
Lucy: Shir, how do you know what a pterodactyl sounds like?
— Shir and Lucy,
discussing a strange emenation from McGraw Tower.
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Oct. 14, 2018
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You want mental illness? You've got mental illness.
— Isaac Sheff,
describing the first season of Netflix's Punisher
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Sept. 10, 2018
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We don't have any robots today that I would want to go to the restroom with
— Henrik Christensen,
Describing Emerging markets for new robots
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Aug. 30, 2018
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Well at least we can all agree that mosquitoes should go die in a fire.
Like Matthew's family.
— Andrew Hirsch,
describing extermination of household pests after a game of dread
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July 12, 2018
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"Pros:
- No technical skills required."
Well, that doesn't sound like a pro to me: it's just a euphemism for the tool being closed source.
— Sam Havron,
Upon reading the description of an Android rooting tool
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July 11, 2018
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Optimizing traders are hard to distinguish from malicious adversaries.
— Yaron Minsky,
Systems Lunch talk on stock exchanges
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April 27, 2018
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