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 Apparently we could get a whopping 3 Chris Lams to attend 
		   — Matvey Soloviev, 
		   scheduling a 4820 staff picnic 
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			 May 17, 2021 
		  
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 Functional languages have this cool feature where they waste half your memory. 
		   — Andrew Myers, 
		   on garbage collection 
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			 May 12, 2021 
		  
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 There's not much forgiveness in an operating system. You do something you're not supposed to do, and you basically just get killed. 
		   — Anne Bracy, 
		   discussing privileged processes in CS 3410. 
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			 May 4, 2021 
		  
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 I wish I could talk to my trees 
		   — Robert Constable
		    
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			 Sept. 2, 2020 
		  
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 What if Mars has better chocoloate? 
		   — Sachille Atapattu, 
		   Considering death by chocolate 
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			 April 14, 2019 
		  
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 Tom: This is somebody's PhD, and maybe not you guys.
Rolph: I already have like three PhDs, I don't want more. 
		   — Rolph Recto, 
		   Discussing feature creep in projects. 
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			 March 7, 2019 
		  
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 Tom: Josh is having trouble. It's the lack of monads.
Josh: Actually. 
		   — Tom Magrino, 
		   explaining why Josh kept taking longer than everyone else to program his RoboRally robot 
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			 March 2, 2019 
		  
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 Stack Overflow often has the answer for how to look up the answer, though. 
		   — Drew Zagieboylo, 
		   explaining how to figure out how to profile Java 
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			 Nov. 19, 2018 
		  
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 If you want to know when he's up, just keep texting him, "U up?" 
		   — Isaac Sheff, 
		   on how to keep tabs on one's friends 
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			 Nov. 16, 2018 
		  
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 Shir: Does anyone know what the sound from the clock tower is? It sounds like a pterodactyl. Or a Whale
Lucy: Shir, how do you know what a pterodactyl sounds like? 
		   — Shir and Lucy, 
		   discussing a strange emenation from McGraw Tower. 
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			 Oct. 14, 2018 
		  
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 You want mental illness? You've got mental illness. 
		   — Isaac Sheff, 
		   describing the first season of Netflix's Punisher 
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			 Sept. 10, 2018 
		  
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 We don't have any robots today that I would want to go to the restroom with 
		   — Henrik Christensen, 
		   Describing Emerging markets for new robots 
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			 Aug. 30, 2018 
		  
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 Well at least we can all agree that mosquitoes should go die in a fire. 
Like Matthew's family. 
		   — Andrew Hirsch, 
		   describing extermination of household pests after a game of dread 
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			 July 12, 2018 
		  
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 "Pros:
- No technical skills required."
Well, that doesn't sound like a pro to me: it's just a euphemism for the tool being closed source. 
		   — Sam Havron, 
		   Upon reading the description of an Android rooting tool 
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			 July 11, 2018 
		  
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 Optimizing traders are hard to distinguish from malicious adversaries. 
		   — Yaron Minsky, 
		   Systems Lunch talk on stock exchanges 
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			 April 27, 2018 
		  
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