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This is an idiot wind blowing through our great nation.
— Serge Belongie,
on the white+gold/blue+black dress debate.
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March 3, 2015
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I cast "speak with idiots!"
— Matthew Milano,
speaking to Adith
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Jan. 21, 2015
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A monoid is like a burrito, except you take out the category of endofunctors.
— Fran Mota
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Dec. 15, 2014
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The best things you would do if you were to die tomorrow are different from the best things you would do if you were to live a full, healthy life.
— Peter Frazier,
offering an analogy on the pitfalls of greedy algorithm.
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Dec. 4, 2014
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You never want to ! an array.
— Greg Morrisett,
CS 411 lecture; on why arrays in C are never implicitly dereferenced when passed to functions.
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Nov. 10, 2003
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I'm famous, you're not.
— Ken Birman,
To students at Brown Bag lunch on "How to give talks".
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Oct. 28, 2003
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You've really got that homeless look going on.
— Andrew Myers,
to Jed, who hasn't been home for one-and-a-half weeks
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2001
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There is no accessible paper on type theory. I'm partially responsible, I've written three papers.
— Bob Constable
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May 8, 1984
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I was exiled for nine months to Ohio State University.
— Juris Hartmanis
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Nov. 8, 1982
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Michelle, aren't your pants off yet?
— Diane Duke
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Aug. 23, 1981
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Philosophers are degenerate forms of octopodes.
— Fred Schneider
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May 23, 1981
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Every time Michelle gets drunk I have to wash her pants.
— Diane Duke
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March 21, 1981
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You can grasp infinity easily, but how can you grasp 245?
— Daniel Leviant
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Feb. 13, 1980
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It's good to write a program occasionally ... as long as you don't run them.
— Edsger W. Dijkstra
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Jan. 15, 1980
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If me can't move, you win.
— John Hopcroft
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Oct. 26, 1979
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